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More so than any other creature on the planet, Human Beings are expert at not being experts on themselves. Very often, the person we are being or the state we find ourselves in is something we desire to move immediately away from.
From what I can make out, birds don’t delude themselves about their own nature. Birds are birds. The thought that they aren’t good enough just as they are, and the urge to move away from an uncomfortable feeling like that just isn’t a thing for them. A monkey doesn’t need to get likes in Instagram to get the dopamine hit that makes life bearable. A kangaroo doesn’t need bigger biceps to hide the fact he has never felt enough. A badger doesn’t need another line of coke at 7am so that he can keep chatting to the new best friends he’s never going to see again because his life otherwise lacks meaning.
Perhaps it is a Human Beings capacity for self-awareness and a supposed conscious ability to adjust his behaviour that makes him susceptible to not accepting who or where he is. Whatever it is, there is no doubt that the Human Race is very often desperate to be something else.
The world in which I reside and work is a combination of personal development and health and wellness. Both are worlds where transformation is the key. The predominant energy in both spheres is a movement away from the self you currently display, and therefore, lack of acceptance is inextricably linked to it.
You may ask, what’s the problem with this? We all have weaknesses, so why not work on them? Good question! The answer to this question is subtle. So subtle that it would be easy to find examples of two people who on the face of things operate in almost exactly the same way, but one acts from lack of acceptance and self-loathing and another would act from total acceptance, self love and is working towards self-actualisation.
The key aspect here is connection. Those who can stay truly connected to themselves through their desire to change and improve will probably navigate the process of transformation with a greater peace of mind, and also with greater results.
Let’s use an example we can all relate to. A bad lower back and the recovery from it.
Person 1 has chronic lower back pain- The pain is so unbearable that they take Tramadol every day. They visit a chiropractor for a quick manipulation once a week. The pain goes away for 24 to 48 hours but always comes back. In the end, they see a consultant and opt for a Microdiscectomy. The procedure gives them some relief but after a while the pain returns and the cycle starts all over again.
Person 2 has chronic lower back pain- The pain is unbearable but whenever possible they feel it, use relaxation and breathing methods to help move through the pain. They visit a trainer who teaches them what their spine is and what might have happened to cause the injury. They decide to embrace health and empower themselves to move and think properly. Their back heals and they can get back to a fulfilling life.
By no means am I seeking to make Person 1 “bad” or “wrong” or by that token person 2 “good” or “right” and the second course of action is definitely not always the answer to said problem. I’ve simply chosen two polarised examples in order to make a point (although I have real life experience of both of the above). However, essentially, in these examples, person one cannot accept the pain he is in and seeks to find the things that takes him as far away from the original problem as possible. He was never prepared to be with himself through it. Person 2, despite the discomfort has moved towards himself. He felt the pain and supported himself by seeking out knowledge of his own body and by following a life more aligned with wellness.
Birds and monkeys and badgers and kangaroos all live in the wild. But for the man-made alterations to their habitats, they live as they are supposed to live. We moved away from that reality. We separated ourselves from the natural world (arguably it is our nature to do that but that is for another blog) and with that came a loss of peace of mind, as did disease both mental and physical. This should be the only clue we need as to what direction we should move. In any situation where change is necessary (and change is necessary) it should be back in the direction of our true selves and not away from them.
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